I realized that it has been a while since I have made a post. Time and life seem to get away from me sometimes.
This year in general seems to be a test in endurance. I feel like either me or someone in my house has been sick since December of last year. Although there were a few days of non-sickness that's not really that far from the truth.
Lately I have been in a great deal of pain again. Which has been frustrating and depressing. I thought we had got a handle on it where I could at least function. I went and saw the Rheumy on Wednesday and said "I feel like every since I had my surgery that the pain has just gradually worked it's way back in and now is worse then ever". She (saw the PA) told me that is not that uncommon really. After a surgery or sickness (oh yeah pneumonia too) you go into a flare and it takes a while to get it back in check often it takes a change up on the dosage or even a change of meds to get you out of it. I LOVE when my doctor makes me feel like I am not crazy or just being a wimp with the pain. So we are trying some different doses on meds (if I can get the insurance to approve one of them, because they said it is over the recommended dose). And added some new ones. One of which I took for the first time last night. And I slept...yes I actually slept from 10pm to 6:30am. I felt like a new woman this morning. If I can get a few more nights of this I might actually become a happy person again. I know my family would like that. I am not a very happy person when I am getting 3 hours of sleep if I am lucky and hurting all the time. It just doesn't work.
I also was given a sleeping pill, but when I went to get it last night the generic form of it was still a 50.00
co-pay so we will wait until payday for that one.
I can not tell you the last day that I didn't have pain. I am not complaining or trying to get you to feel sorry for me. Just to maybe have it make a little more sense to some. Unlike a guy at work who said " you are too young to hurt that bad" or " maybe if you lost more weight it would help". Yes real things that have been said to me. To which I replied "Illness knows no age" and (pardon my language) "Screw you! I have lost 43lbs since January. You take steroids 5 different times get 3 different steroid shots in a year and tell me how easy it is for you to take off that extra weight your carrying around!" "Not to mention I feel lucky to get out of bed and dressed most days, exercise is not the easiest thing to do right now, if you want to pay for my membership at the health plex so I can work out in the water, great!" OK So it ticked me off a little.
On a brighter note some things I am loving. That my 3yr old has this southern drawl sometimes. I admit to pretend I didn't hear him the first time, just so I can hear him say it again. I enjoy it in the mornings that I take a shower and the mirror fogs up. I only wipe off enough for my face. It gives me that view of my pretty face and nothing else. Like my own little glamour shot LOL. I also like that when I am standing in front of said mirror my puppy dog likes to lay on my feet and keep them warm. To some this may be an annoyance, but to me where the cold hurts so bad it feels nice. Maybe that is why she does it.... they say dogs can sense things in their owners hhhmmmm?? I am so grateful that my teenager is so very loving and thoughtful. She helps cook and clean, helps give her brother a bath. I do not take all these things lightly. I know she could so be a pain in the backside and just give me more pain, but she doesn't. I tell her often how much I appreciate it and how much it helps.
On a random note as I was scrapping off the windows and Ron was doing his. I said why can't they make all the other windows in the car defrost like the back one? It is cleaned off completely by the time I scrape the others. He said they tried it for a while on the Taurus, but something about it took too much juice and the battery wasn't getting recharged. Shucks. So if you know a whiz kid, tell them to invent a way for that to work will ya please? My aching body would love ya forever!